I am often asked, “what can make both family and professional caregiving so enriching?’’ Others ask, “Why did you use the word “enrich” in the title of your book?” One of the strategies that I employed, as my caregiving experience continued, was to celebrate the little victories, the moments when my efforts paid off for my husband, my family, and for myself. In other words, I got smarter and along the way, more “enriched”. Professional caregivers (including physical therapists, occupational therapists, respiratory therapists, and speech language pathologists) can also employ this strategy to great advantage.
Let me provide a metaphor to explain how to watch for personal growth both for yourself and for your patients and their families. During the holiday season, I received an amaryllis from a friend. My friend also gave one of these plants, symbols of the holiday season, to some of our other friends. Each amaryllis was in a paper bag and, as it happened, I choose the bag enclosing the shortest and stubbiest of the lot. Once removed from the bags, one amaryllis was just about ready to burst, a huge red bloom clearly poking out at the tip while others were in some taller and more robust stage than mine. My immediate reaction was to compare the growth of mine to the others, but I stopped short thinking, “My little one, while shorter at this point, could eventually produce the most glorious bloom of all”. Two weeks on, my gorgeous plant has indeed sprouted and produced a tall and proud reminder of the season past.
As we look at personal growth and healing, sometimes small and stubby like my amaryllis, it’s easy to get depressed and impatient that progress isn’t going as fast or as effectively as we would like. Before my caregiving journey, I know that I would not have stopped myself and remembered to be patient. Your patients want to heal as quickly as possible and you want them to; when it doesn’t happen as quickly as hoped, stress and impatience can take over. Be reminded of stories like the tortoise and the hare where speed toward the destination is not always the best journey to take.
Each of your patients is growing in his/her own soil. Blooms vary and take time to sprout . When you remind your patients of this truism, you are providing great wisdom, encouragement, and empowerment. When you practice reminding yourself of this wisdom in your own life, you will live out and model the value for your patients.
So what are strategies for identifying and celebrating small victories for yourself and in your role as a healthcare professional ? As you embark on the challenges and opportunities for 2011, consider using the following steps for savoring small victories and tracking growth:
-Practice the art of patience by “aligning” with your patient’s needs and rhythms. As a professional, you certainly need to proactively encourage your patient to strive for improvement, but if you set goals that are too far ahead of where the situation is, you are setting yourself up for needless frustration.
-Pay attention to the little victories (improvements) and identify them for the patient.
-Encourage patients to write down their small victories or write them down for them. When you have a moment, ask the patient to read them aloud.
-Assist patients and their families in breaking down complex issues and logistical procedures. Help them make sense of medications, particularly as they return home. Reinforce they good job they’re doing to manage the situation by breaking it down into manageable parts.
-Apply each of these strategies to your own life and profession.
As a professional caregiver, I also encourage you to keep track of your personal growth by asking for feedback from yourself and others. The following questions may be useful in guiding your conscious thinking for the New Year:
-How am I improving in my role as a professional caregiver?
-What have I noticed about my patience with others and with myself?
-Have I asked colleagues for help in giving me feedback on my development?
-Do I observe improvement in my professional role to have positive effects on my personal/home life?
You may be wondering how to celebrate each small victory for yourself and others. Celebrations start with your observations and paying attention to change and growth. That smile on your face when you recognize that your ability to reduce stress and develop patience has increased is in itself a small celebration. A celebration can be as simple as looking into your patient’s eyes and seeing the pride of accomplishment and determination. Trying to get better should also be celebrated as trying hard is the prelude to actual improvement.
Have a very Happy New Year!
Margery Pabst is the co-author of “Enrich Your Caregiving Journey”, the “2010 Caregiver Friendly Award” winner. The book holds many tools and techniques for both the family and professional caregiver. Find out more about Margery and the book at www.pivotalcrossings.com.